Monday, October 27, 2008

The Power Of Forgiving Yourself... and Others!!

In life, we all make mistakes. And that is especially true for our work in this industry. Those mistakes could show up in any number of areas, including:

- Not being faithfully using your company's products
- Screwing up your prospects
- Not fully engaging in building your business
- Not advancing to the next rank
- Failing to hit a goal
- Allowing distractions to take you off track
- Being inconsistent in your building efforts
- Someone hurt your feelings and you allowed that to stop your growth
- Not stepping into your role as a leader
- Running good people out of your organization
- Or a MILLION other challenges!

A personal note for all of you…
Over the past year or so, I have NOT been my most solid when it comes to building my organization. Among other challenges, I went through a divorce and even though it was very amicable, it took a toll on me and my ability to lead. Don't get me wrong, I made lots of money during that time, but I wasn't the leader I should have been and parts of my group suffered. And since the beginning of this year I've really beaten myself up over it.

That is something I think we all do. When we don't live up to our own expectations, we beat on ourselves and beat on ourselves and beat on ourselves. It's so unhealthy and so unproductive!

Over the past 3 months, I've come to the realization that this is a pattern I need to change in my life and I've made significant progress in this area.

The following is what I've used to make that happen…

When it comes to success in Network Marketing (and in life), you can count on two things:

1. You WILL make mistakes. Mistakes in judgment. Mistakes in execution. Mistakes in what you leave out. Mistakes in what you put in. Expect it.

2. No matter now prepared you think you are, this business will test you and this business will surprise you. Just when you think you have it "all wrapped up", something happens to humble you.

I have learned that, too often, people in network marketing hold onto their "failures" and dwell on them. It's like obsessively chewing on the same piece of gum for year after year, as it collects more gunk, bacteria, mouth goo, etc. You wouldn't do that would you? But so many people dwell on their "failures". Or on how someone or something else failed them.

Look, the problem with dwelling on all this is… what you dwell on… you are actually just rehearsing and retraining your mind to do the next time around!

That is the problem with "slumps". The more you dwell on how awful you are doing, the more you carry those emotions into your efforts. It's like putting a 100 pound lead weight around each leg and then trying to jump out of a 30 foot hole!

What you mentally dwell on with strong emotion is what you communicate to your subconscious mind that you want it to do!

Despite all your positive programming, which I believe in and teach, your negative programming through dwelling on mistakes will more likely influence how you think, act and respond, because it is most familiar and it is what you believe in with strong emotion.

Remember this: the unconscious is most impressed by anything that includes strong emotion, repetition and strong belief. It does what is most familiar, not what you necessarily most consciously may want.

So avoiding this negative loop requires better attitudes toward learning. It requires the discipline and awareness to notice when you are beating on yourself and to STOP IT. And it requires acceptance of mistakes.

If you find yourself dwelling on the past or getting mad that you are not making fast enough progress, try the following two steps:

1. Get yourself in a nice meditative state. Or if you're not into that, just get yourself into a quiet place and take a series of deep breaths.

2. Then, to yourself, silently, repeat the following (put it on a 3x5 card if necessary so you have it with you):

"I made mistakes as part of my learning. I HAD to make those mistakes to see where I can move to next. There is no way I could NOT have made them. Those mistakes are the foundation of new power just as soon as I forgive and release them.

Since more mistakes will always be unavoidable, I will embrace them MORE quickly, forgive MORE easily, so I can more quickly move into POWER.

Forgiving others, and letting them go is good training for forgiving myself. So even if they don't "deserve" it I will do it for my own sake. I will either get what I want or learn what I need to. Mistakes are just MARKERS, marking out where I can step into new freedom, choice, power and growth.

I may wish I had been born more evolved or perfect, but THIS is my path and I embrace it, I may not always like it, I may slip and grumble, BUT THIS IS MY PATH. I will let my learning's pull me forward and I will never stop learning until I draw my last breath."

For all of my Network Marketing Professional friends, I want you to know there is tremendous power in forgiving yourself. Please take a moment and do that right now. And in the future, if you realize you're beating yourself up again, REMEMBER to keep doing it as you move forward on your journey.

I remain your biggest fan,

Eric Worre – Network Marketing Professional

P.S. For my friends in Non-English speaking countries around the world, if you could please translate this and post it in the discussion board, I'd appreciate it. Thanks.

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